I decided that since I have all this wonderful Emergency Department experience and all the interesting things I have seen, it is time to start writing.
I honestly am an ED nurse. I have worked in Emergency for more than 13 years. I have worked at large intercity teaching hospitals and while I was a traveling nurse I worked in Emergency Departments ranging from 12 beds all the way up to 90 beds.
Now, there really is no difference in the people that you see in the small emergency departments and the large ones. Rural or Urban people have mishaps. This one is an introduction to the Masturbation side of the mishaps and then I will have to write about the sexual mishaps too because they are just as wild.
Number 1. Do not place glass products in your vagina or anus. (Unless of course it is a glass dildo, meant for insertion). This is to include bottles, beer bottles, rum bottles, wine bottles, light bulbs, nail polish bottles and other assorted glass objects. Seriously, this one happens all the time.
My latest story about glass objects didn't even come from a patient. It actually came from a Co-Worker. One of our tech's decided to say out loud that she had a day when she was so horny and she didn't own any sex toys. She was hot and bothered and saw no relief, she looked around and didn't see anything more suitable than a bottle of rum.
She covered it at least with one of her rubber gloves and had at it. Thank goodness she didn't have a mishap and end up in our Emergency Department with a vaginal bleed related to the glass bottle breaking. She would have had to quit her job. One would never outlive the stories.
She then stated that when she had company come over within the next week, she offered them drinks but stated that she didn't have any rum, at which time her husband of course said that there was a bottle in the bedroom. She saved herself by saying that it had been broken and there was no rum left.
There will be more stories coming.......