Thursday, December 6, 2012

Charms Lace By Jopen

Charms Lace Key By Jopen

Multiple Settings
Easy to care for


Oh my, where to start.  It is not as strong as oh say the Salsa but, it is right up there.  I do enjoy the textures and that is why I grabbed up the lace one.  I like it!!  The only drawback that I have is that it is battery powered but I do understand that the rechargeable function would definitely increase the price.

I have used my lace alone for clitoral stimulation and a little bit of insertion.  I like the sensations that the raised lace pattern gives.  My husband and I used it together and he even stated that this one is right up there with the earthquake one (the salsa).  He likes the textured sensations along his scrotal area also.  We did have it in place with some intercourse action and it is a little to large to be comfortable for any period of time.  The textures are sure to excite all of your and your lover’s erogenous zones!

The Charms Lace Key is made with an ABS plastic bullet covered with a silicone sleeve.  The cap and button portion is made from a stainless alloy.  The silicone has the highest safety rating and all the components are non porous, hypoallergenic, latex and phthalates free.

  The bullet itself if black in color with the silver colored metal cap, it is velvety smooth and soft.  The outer sleeve of the Lace is made from silicone and comes in several color options, the blue, pink and purple.  The outer sleeve does come off of the bullet but it takes some work and fingernails.  The sleeve could be used on other bullet type toys. The silicone that the Lace is made from is very soft and velvety feeling, it really doesn’t collect any lint or hair.  There is no smell to this toy and no tastes either.

The Lace texture has large bumps that are connected together with raised lines.  The bumps are very prominent and all of the textures can be felt when they glide across your skin and your erogenous zones.

The lace pattern can be a pain to clean after use.  You can throw the silicone sleeve in the dishwasher or boil it. The bullet cannot be heated as it will ruin the motor.  The entire toy can be cleaned with antibacterial soaps and water  toy sprays. On the packaging it says to use water based lubes.  I definitely only use water based with my toys as I have been told that other lubes can damage your toys. Or the finish on the toys.

  The bullet is a total of 3 3/4 inches long including the cap. It has a ¾ inch diameter and 2 ½ inch circumference.  The cap portion is all that shows when the sleeve is in place and the cap portions is ½ inch long.  It is insertable to 3 inches.  It is solid and firm. The silicone sleeve has a thickness of 1 /8th inch.  I would compare it to the thickness of the silicone baking cupcake forms.  It is squishy and flexible when it is off of the bullet.

The Charms Lace runs on one AA battery.  The cap twists to the left revealing the water proofed O ring and it snaps back on turning it to the right.  It does past the water proofing test as my husband threw it in the sink with the water running, as I was about to loose it I found out happily that it still worked!!  The stainless alloy cap has a push button on the end to turn the toy on and off and to change functions,  The button has KEY written on it and a small Key logo.

The Charms Lace Bullet has 5 functions.  To turn it on you hit the button once, it then will cycle through it’s five settings.  When you want to turn it off you push the button and hold it in for 3 seconds.  It doesn’t have any memory so when you turn it back on you have to cycle through the setting to get to the one that you prefer.  It is very quiet and cannot be heard over the covers.

1. High steady vibration
2. High fast steady pulse
3. Roller coaster effect from low to high
4. Fast pulsations
5. A chaotic throb, 2 hard, 3 softer

The packaging is really nice,  There is an outer sleeve with product information.  A ribbon from the main box comes through a cut out in the top.  The outer sleeve slips off the top to reveal the inner box with more information and a flip top style opening to the foam cut out that holds the toy.  Included are product information pages on hard card stock and a storage pouch.

The storage pouch is scratchy black more of a nylon type of material with a key logo sewn in the side.  It does come with a one year warranty.

The Charms Lace Key even though it is battery operated still earns a 5 out of 5 in my book.  I have oh so happy with it's textures and performance.

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Thursday, December 13, 2012

Love Rider Wild Butterfly

Love Rider Wild Butterfly By California Exotics

Great concept
Multiple Patterns
Controller waterproof
Long Cord

Penis part is small
Where the cord goes into control there is not a water proof seal.

This one may be small and it may be battery operated.  But I have to say that this one really works for me.

The butterfly is made primarily for solo use,  it is for vaginal use but since it is made from silicone you could use this one anally also. It’s wing span will prevent the toy from going missing if you use it anally and the antennae will work for perinea stimulation.  Depending on your anatomy you may be able to get some p-spot or g-spot stimulation also!

The butterfly and penis portion of the toy is made from silicone with a small amount of drag to it.  The silicone is completely nonporous, and hypoallergenic.  It is latex and phthalates free.  There is no taste or smell to this toy.  The silicone does collect lint and hair.    The Rider comes in both black and pink. There is a slight texture to the penis portion of the toy with head type of appearance to the tip of the penis.  The antennae are free moving and the wings do have textures on the external side of them.

The control is made from plastic and when you open the battery compartment there is a waterproof o ring that circles the entire opening. I did notice that there isn’t a seal where the cord goes into the controller.  The controller is  3 inches long and 2 inches wide.  The cord that connects the controller to the butterfly is 23 inches long.

The penis portion is 3 inches long with a diameter of 1 ¼ inches.  The wing span on the butterfly wings is 3 inches long and 2 ¾ inches across.  The antennae sit ½ inch off of the body of the butterfly.  The maximum thickness of the body of the butterfly is approximately 1 ¼ inches.  The wings are thickest at the body and taper outward to a thickness of approximately 1 /16th of an inch.  The wings do flutter on the outer sides with the vibrations are turned up.

The butterfly works with 2 AAA batteries.  The controller has two buttons, one to turn the toy on and the upper button to cycle through the levels.  There is an area of three lights that glow red when you are using the toy.  They light up corresponding to the level and pattern of vibrations.  When you turn the toy off  you have to restart your patterns.   This toy is very quiet, I would say that it could barely be heard over the covers and I have worn it around the house in my pants and no one says that they can hear it.  I would say that it’s vibrations are more rumbly than buzzy and I would say that they are pretty close to a 4 on the vroom scale.

 It has a total of 7 levels of vibrations.  1. Low. 2. Medium. 3. High. 4. A steady fast pulsation. 5.  An Escalating pattern. 6. A Higher pulsation.  7. Three pulses and steady repeatedly.  The vibrations can be felt prominently in the tip of the penis.  The wings flutter as well as the antennae.

The wild rider is easy to clean with a 10% bleach solution, toy sprays, antibacterial soaps and water, or your toy wipes.  If you use lube with the toy water based only as the silicone lubes can harm the finish on the toy.  It is easy to store in a plastic baggy or the disposable bag that it comes in.  Be sure to store away form other toys so the finish isn’t ruined by toys melding or bleeding colors.

The love rider wild butterfly comes in a white cal exotic’s box with product information on it and it comes wrapped in a white foam style bag.  There is nothing special about the packaging.

I have to say that if I were to design a sex toy for myself it would be very similar to this one.  There are a few things that I would change such as making the penis portion larger.  I love this toy.  I am able to insert it leaving the cord coming out the top of my pants and putting the controller in my pocket.  I can wear it while I sit at my computer and type.  I can fold my laundry or just sit in y bed.  I like to have the pressure with sitting to have the toy flush on my labia.

I would suggest this toy to all, from beginners to experienced toy users.  It teases and yes I can orgasm with it.  For the price this one is definitely a winner.

I would rate it 5 out of 5.  And I would purchase it again.

product picture
G-spot and clitoral vibrator  by California Exotic
Material: Silicone


The Lick by Rocks Off LTD


Soft, pliable silicone
Carries Vibrations well
Easy  to Clean
You can use multiple bullets with outer sleeve


Bullet not strong enough for power queens

The lick is made from a soft flexible tongue shaped silicone.  It comes with the RO 80 Bullet included with  the included dreaded N type battery.  The tongue portion is basically a bullet sleeve and yes, it is able to handle other bullet such as the tango and the salsa.

The Lick is a soft, slightly sticky silicone that collects huge amounts of lint and hair.  That really isn’t bad considering it is soft and pliable and boy, what it can do.  The silicone has no taste and no smell to it.  It is thinner in the flexible tip area and it warms up to your body very nicely and “licks” wonderfully.  The Lick is completely smooth with no textures, it has one area that is slightly depressed in the center of the tongue area but that doesn’t seem to add or take away from the experience of using the toy.  It comes in both red and  black.

 The silicone is of the safest materials for sex toys, being latex and phthalates free.  It is hypoallergenic and non porous.  The vibrations carry through the silicone very nicely.   It works especially great when you heat up the silicone sleeve in a cup of hot water.  It becomes warm and pliable and the vibrations are even more intensified.

The lick has a total length of   4 ¾ inches, at it’s widest it is 1 ¼ inch thick.  At the tip area it is 1/8th of an inch across and 1/8th inch thick it then tapers back.  It is tongue shaped.

The sleeve inside is 3 inches long and has a diameter of ½ inch.  The salsa and the tango easily slip into the tongue with the use of a small amount of lube that assists with getting the bullet out.

The bullet that comes with the lick, is the RO 80.  It is 3 inches long and has a 5/8th  inch diameter.  The bullet is smooth and made from plastic.  It is high the safety rating scale.  It is non porous, hypoallergenic.  Latex and phthalates free.  It is completely smooth with a raised logo area.  It has an on and off function.  The vibrations are actually pretty strong and quiet.  The bullet is waterproof with an O ring present.  It runs on one N type battery that is included with the toy.

 This little bullet is quiet powerful and when mixed with the silicone tongue,  It really does rock!  The bullet’s vibrations are strongest t the tip and then they transmit to the tip of the lick wonderfully.  The bullet is so quite that it cannot be heard over the covers and I would say it rates a vroom level of 3 not over the top but great with teasing and stimulation.  The bullet used alone can make your hand go tingly, but not when used with the silicone portion.  The bullet is controlled by one button on the end of it.  It only has an on and off function with the one vibration setting.

Water based lubes are the best to be used with the silicone toys so that the silicone’s won’t meld or ruin the finish on the toy.  I also store my silicone toys away from other toys weather they be silicone or other materials so that none of the finishes on the toys get’s compromised.

The Lick silicone portion can be cleaned with antibacterial soaps and water, toy sprays, you can boil it or place it on the top shelf of your dishwasher.  The bullet portion cannot be heated, so antibacterial soap and water or your toy sprays to clean it up.

The Toys from Rocks off all come in a nice box made for the toy with  a flip top lid and they are presented nicely.  They are ready for gift giving.

I use the lick my self for solo play but I have also used it in couples play with my husband. It works great on the clitoris as well as your whole external female and anal areas.  I tend to like larger toys for vaginal use but the lick can go there too.  I would not suggest this one for internal anal play as it definitely would go missing.  When the lick is warmed up it brings a whole new dimension to this toy and I love to have it “licking” my “taint” area between my anus and vagina.  I would suggest that experience for everyone!!!

I would rate this one a 4 out of 5.  I really like it, it gives great sensations. I actually like it better when I use it with my salsa.  It’s bullet is really good but not great.  I am happy with this purchase and would do it again.  This one is great for beginners and experienced toy players alike.

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Pack and Play No. 2

Pack and Play No.2 From Tantus


Great for beginners to dildo’s and Pegging
Non intimidating size
Squishy and flexible
Lightly Textured


Textures aren’t really felt
Not good for packing

This is a great looking and feeling Dildo.  It has some textures that can barely be felt.  It has a  few veins and it’s head does have a slight lip to it but since it is soft and squishy the textures are not  pronounced with use.

It is marketed as a packer but since it does stand up so well I have read that it doesn’t work well for packing.  I myself do not use it in this manner so I am unable to say.  It does work in an O ring  harness for pegging use and I use it as a dildo.  It works wonderful for use as a dildo as it has the girth and diameter but it’s length is not out of control.

It works great for vaginal and anal use.  It’s total length is 6 inches long and has an insertable area of 5 ¼ inches.  It has a diameter of 1 ½ inches.  It’s side flange is  ¾ of an inch from the shaft to stop it from being used in while using it anally, and for it to be held by an O ring.  It is more straight with only a very slight curve to it. It doesn’t seem to do well for g- spot stimulation.

For someone who is used to smaller diameter of dildo’s this would be a good one to move up in dimensions with, since it has “give” to it.  I love my textures but this one with the not so pronounced textures feels really good and it’s squishiness is a new vaginal sensation for me.  It is hard to explain when my vaginal walls clamp down on it, there is no discomfort.  I don’t feel like I have to pry it out of my vagina. Due to the soft squishiness the pack and play is great for thrusting and pegging as you won’t have the issue of injuring any one or causing great discomfort.
 It feels quite squishy and it is very flexible, so much so that it can be folded in half.  If you did use it for packing it you would be able to stuff it in your pants but the bulging would be quite evident.

It is made of silicone which is non porous and hypoallergenic, it is latex and phthalates free.  It has no taste and no scent to it.  The Tantus packaging states Ultra Premium Platinum  Silicone.  Silicone is one of the safest materials for sex toys to be made from since is it is able to be sterilized and used by multiple partners in multiple orifices without worrying about transmitting bacteria.

It does collect some lint and hair which is normal for this grade of silicone.  The pack and play only comes in one color which Tantus calls cocoa but it looks to be a caramel color to me.  It has a shiny looking head to it.  It is squishy and I am able to indent it with my fingers when I squeeze it.

The silicone Pack and play needs to be used with water based lubricants as silicone and hybrid lubricants can ruin the finish and can end up deforming your dildo as they silicone can meld with other silicones. The toy needs to be stored away from other silicone's as they too can meld and the finish on the dildo can be hurt.

Silicone dildo’s are easy to care for, you can place this one on the top shelf of your dishwasher, you can boil it.  You can use antibacterial soaps and water or toy sprays to clean it.  It doesn’t have any seams or grooves that you need to pay attention to when cleaning.

There isn’t anything  exciting about Tantus packaging.  A clear plastic box with product information on it.

This has been compared to the Tatus O2 Mark, as I don’t have the Mark I cannot say exactly but according to product descriptions and reviews he is pretty much one in the same except for a slight difference in size.

I would rate the pack and play No.2 a 5 out of 5 as a dildo and I really cannot rate it as a packer but it seems that it wouldn't work the best for that purpose.

product picture
Realistic dildo  by Tantus
Material: Silicone

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Pirates Hidden Pleasure

Pirates Hidden  Pleasure Vibrator by Digital Playground


Splash proof
Cool Design on the vibe
Rumbly vibrations


Made from Plastic
Only 3 settings
Short in Length

This is actually an impressive little vibe.  It runs on only 1 battery and has some awesome vibrations.  I would suggest this one for beginners.  It is smooth without textures and comes in a really cool looking box.  It is hard to see on the pink but it has some really neat looking pirate designs on the vibe.

The Hidden Pleasures is great as a pinpoint clitoral vibrator.  It works as an internal vibrator also but it is not as long as I would like it to be.   I also like to use this on my external labia and the area between my vagina and my anus.   It is straight with no curves.  You can use this alone or with a partner.  My husband really likes vibrations on his scrotal area.  I would not suggest using this one anally as it will go missing.  It has no flared base to it.

It is made of plastic which is non porous, hypoallergenic.  Latex and Phthalates free.  You can use any type of lube with the plastic from your oils, to silicone, hybrids or the trusty old water based.  It is easy to clean with antibacterial soaps and water.  You can use your toy sprays or wipes.  Do not boil or place in the dishwasher as it can ruin the motor.

It has 3 vibration settings that are controlled on the end of the vibrator.  It has one push button with a 3 on it.  The first setting is more buzzy but the 2nd and 3rd settings are quite rumbly.  It is quiet and cannot be heard over the comforter.  It doesn’t have any patterns just the vibrations.  You hit the button on the end to cycle through the vibrations and to turn it off.  It runs on one AA battery and the battery seems to last for quite a long time.

It is smooth and seamless.  Straight with no curve.  It has silver colored textures at the end where the controls are located and a waterproof O ring seal.  It has a total length of  5 inches and I would say that it is insertable up to the textured area which is located 3 5/8 inches up the vibrator.  It has a diameter of 1 inch.

It comes with it’s own storage case which is pink to match the vibrator.  The case is 5 ½ inches long and has a domed looking top. There are the same pirate looking designs on the case as there are on the vibrator. It is made from the same pink plastic with silver textured bands that match the vibrator. It has black satin covering the plastic that holds the vibrator in place.  It is  both cute and cheesy looking at the same time.   The vibe and case both come in pink and black.   It is unusual which makes it neat.  You can also store it in a plastic baggy and even though it is plastic I would keep it from my other toys.

I would say that this is good for beginners,  I like to use it as I would a bullet for more external stimulation.  I am impressed with it’s vibrations on the 2nd and 3rd levels.

I would rate this one a 3 out of 5.  It has it’s good qualities but I don’t see myself reaching for it over my other clitoral vibes.

product picture
Discreet massager by Digital Playground
Material: Plastic

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The Jollie by Chavez Dezignz

OMG!OMG! This has become one of my favorite toys!!


Wild Looking
Clitoral Stimulation
Easy to care for
Enhanced Solo play



I received this wonderful, odd looking hunk of silicone from a friend as a gift.  The wild thing is that it didn’t come with any packaging and she had no idea what it’s name was.  I cleaned it and I used it.  It blew me away.  I had started searching internet sites and blogs.  I finally found out what it is called….. The Jollie.

The Jollie is a large odd shaped piece of  silicone.  It looks like some kind of a cross between a herniated penis and a gun.  It is quite heavy.  At it’s longest it measures 8 inches.  It has an  insertable area of 4 ½ inches.  It’s largest diameter is 2  inches.  **All measurements are approximates** 

 The outer area of the Jollie has a handle looking circle with grooves that sit near your clitoral area. This area measures 2 inches off of the main hump.  The handle area is ¾  inch across.   Then it has this curve, the curve is 4 ½ inches to the end of the handle.

The handle looking area really isn’t a handle at all.  After reading blogs and then the Chavez Dezignz web site.  I found that the hole is meant to be tapped on for clitoral stimulation or for placing your favorite bullet.  The Jollie isn’t a thrusting type of toy at all.  I figured this out on my own anyway.  It was meant to be placed in your vagina and left in place.  It is very filling.  You then can rock on it and tap the handle or place a bullet in the handle.  The one hump that is somewhat similar to a penis head that is near the tip of the insertable area is to sit under your cervix and the large middle ump is to fill you to your g- spot area.

Without all this knowledge I found that it filled me up and feels really good!!  Shh, it also feels really good if you place it in backwards and the handle goes towards your anal area with the curve near your clitoris too.

Since finding it’s web site I found out that this toy was produced by another manufacturer that stopped a few years ago.  Before my adventures into sex toys.  Then this year sex toy bloggers found it on Etsy and Chavez Designz.  I cannot believe that this one ever went missing.  I simply love it.  Chavez Dezignz makes it in a purple, black, blue, green, red, and pink.  They  have deluxe editions that is clear silicone with spots and designs placed in the silicone.  You can even custom make your own.

Mine is a beautiful purple silicone.  The silicone does have some drag to it and it collects lint and hair.  There is no smell to my Jollie.  The shaft of the Jollie is very firm and the handle area is very flexible.  I use water based lubricants with my Jollie. It is easy to clean with antibacterial soaps and water, and toy sprays.  My Jollie stood up to boiling and I don’t see why you couldn’t place it in the dishwasher.

The silicone is non porous, hypoallergenic.  It is latex and phthalates free.  It is easy to clean and I store it in a gallon sized plastic bag.  I definitely keep it from my other toys as I didn’t know what it was at first and I didn’t want to ruin it.

When I first insert this toy it kind of makes me take in a  breath.  It is very filling and it does require that it be lubed up.  I am instantly filled.  This one is best used if you are already “warmed up” and aroused.  I like to place my salsa in the hole and gently rock back and for while up on my knees.  I also like to sit on the edge of my bed and just rock.  I was quite surprise when I removed the toy the first time and the large amount of my fluids that flowed out after the toy.  It is such a wonderful sensation to be filled and rock yourself exciting your clitoris.

I wouldn’t say that this is a couples toy.  It is my big solo secret.  If I were rich I would buy all of my friends this toy.  It definitely isn’t for beginners and it makes size queens smile.

At  you can see all of the versions of the Jollie.  They are also available on  They have other adult toys you can peek at and they also have some neat looking ashtrays that they make from silicone.

This one is worth checking out.

I rate this one a 10 out of 10 or 5 out of 5 which ever scale you are using.  I have no complaints and there are no drawbacks!

You can get off with your Jollie!!

1 comment:

Jen said...
I have never heard one bad thing about the Jollie... I need one so bad! Thanks for the great review!!

Little Su

Little su From Joya


Clitoral attachment
Easy to clean



I love this dildo.  I only wish that it were a vibrator.  It has the filling vaginal portion and an awesome clit attachment.  It has a neat design and I have to say that if I were to design a sex toy it would be similar to this one.

The little su has the coolest packaging.  It looks like a book,  the pages are a foam material that has the cut out for the toy to rest.  The first few pages of the book explain the toy’s use, materials and a story about little su.

The dildo is made for vaginal use.  You can use this alone or it also works well for two females.  There is a description in the book that show how two females can use the toy with the clitoral bump working for both partners.  I found that I really liked to have this in and rock on the bed or on one of my firmer pillows.   You can use this one anally as it’s attachment would prevent it from going missing.  You could wear it with anal intercourse if you choose.

The book explains that the dildo is made from certified, non toxic, medical grade materials.  It doesn’t say that it is silicone until you read the book.  The book explains that it is soft, durable, hygienic, odorless, nonporous, anti-allergic, easy to clean and phthalates free.

To me, the little su acts like and feels like silicone. It heats up to your body and becomes a bit more pliable with use.   I wash it with anti bacterial soaps and water and my toy sprays.  You can  boiling it or placing it in the dishwasher, you can also wash it down with a 10% bleach solution.  It does collect some lint and hair and it is completely odorless.

The little su is 4 ½ inches long.  The attachment that comes forward on the clitoris is 4 inches long.  The clit bump sits up  ½ inch from the base and the bump also extended ½ inch down from the base.  This is for female to female excitement.  The placement of the clitoral bump is perfect.

The area that extends from the vagina to the clitoris has lined ridges present.  They are raised approximately 1/8 th of an inch.   The entire external area is 1 ¼ inch wide and is very flexible.

The internal portion has a girth of  approximately  1 ½ inches with a circumference of 4 ½ inches.  The dildo is somewhat triangular shaped and it fits so well in the vagina.  The area at the opening of the vagina has a circumference of 2 ½ inches or a diameter of  approximately 1 inch.

I really enjoy wearing this one and rocking on my chair also.  It fits perfectly and the silicone attachment does carry vibrations well when I hit the area with my salsa or my Mimi.  The little su does come in a vibrating version and I may need to invest in that one too.

The story of little su is one that  she gave money to a poor man, he went on his way and she never took a husband or lover. She was known for her intellect and great beauty.  She pursued the values of love, beauty, and humanity.  She died tragically at 19 years of age.  She has been considered a romantic heroine.

The book portion of the packaging contains information in several languages.

I would definitely rate this dildo a 5/5.  It hits all the right spots!

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Yoga Swing From PipeDreams

Yoga Swing  Fetish Fantasy  Series by Pipedream

where is the body sling?
None that I have found
You do get a free mask

Poor materials
Poor construction
Not for out of shape older people

What a huge disappointment!  It may be ok if you are 20 and very flexible and 90 pounds, but it’s materials that it is made from is so poor that I really don’t think that I would trust this one.  In theory a great idea and product if it were made from quality materials.  I would call this sticks and rubber bands!!

There are pieces of cardboard like material, they feel just like cardboard and move like cardboard, but they are encased in the fabric so I don’t know for sure.  This is in the area that is for leg support.  The hand grips are actually a foam that is used for pipe insulation and they have tears on the ends straight from the box.  It is as if they weren’t cut properly.

The eye bolt that goes into the ceiling beams is present and it is solid with welding present to increase the strength.  A carabineer then connects two springs to the eye bolt and attaches to a black metal bar that you can use to hold onto when getting in and out of the swing and when you are using the swing. The springs are 5 inches long. You can’t hold on to the springs as they expand and you run the risk of catching your fingers in them and then loosing your fingers.

The black metal bar has rings welded into place on each end and a carabineer then attaches all of the fabric to that metal bar.  The metal bar is 16 inches long  So your entire weight is supported  on each side by one carabineer.

From the carabineer each side has a fabric piece that is 5 foot long.  One end is the cardboard leg support area.  The other end holds a second piece of fabric that is 48 inches long with the foam hand grasps at each end.

These fabric pieces are not adjustable at all.  These pieces are on each side of the sling that holds your main body.  So you have a total of 4 foam pieces and 2 cardboard pieces.  I don’t understand why you would have 4 hand pieces and 2 leg pieces.  Since they don’t adjust and the fabric just slides through the carabineer if you don’t have your hands on each of the foam pieces there is nothing to counteract the leg piece so it slides out of control.  The foam pieces are 6 inches long and 5 inches around.  The cardboard piece is 8 inches by 8 inches square.

The main body sling is 32 inches long and 13 inches wide.  It has padding on each of the ends with one end having 2 inches of padding and the other side having 2 ½ inches.  The padding in places is not solid and there are areas where there is no padding present.

The sling is attached to the same carabineer that holds those arm and leg pieces.  The fabric that holds the sling hangs down  16 inches from the black ring to the start of the fabric opening for the sling.

The fabric is not soft at all it is very scratchy.  It is a polyester type of sweatshirt material.  It can be spot cleaned with cold water.  You could take the fabric off of the carabineer and throw it in the wash.  There is no washing instructions included in the packaging.  I wouldn’t trust washing the foam or the cardboard areas.

The box shows a man and woman using the swing but when I look at the pictures there is no way they could be doing the positions shown since the extra pieces would be hanging someplace when she has her hands  gasping the handles and both legs in the leg area.  You do get a free mask with the swing.

I waited weeks and watched the sales to purchase this one.  I was so excited. Then it got here and the moment that I took it from the box the disappointment grew with each of the pieces and parts that I looked at.  I cannot believe the full price for this swing and I would not suggest purchasing it.

As for an in shape 21 year old who weighs 120lbs my son says that it is “crap” and he wouldn’t use it or trust it.  The packaging actually states that it can hold up to 300 lbs.  I would be really scared.
It is hard to even rate this a 1 out of any number.

1 comment:

K said...
Ugh, thanks for the warning! I'll stay away from this one.

A Swing, a swing!!

Fetish Fantasy Series  Fantasy  Swing  by Pipedream

Oh, Oh, Oh.  I tell you what, I am really a kinky person now.  I own, and use, and  I love my Sex Swing.  I say that I am kinky now, as opposed to any time before, because growing up in the 80’s  the really wild kinky people were the only ones who had sex swings.  That was just over the edge.  ( Ok, I grew up in North Dakota)

The Swing is for everybody and anybody.  Men, Women, couples of any type.  Young and old alike.  I actually think that the swing would be great for older couples as it helps to relieve some of the issues with sore backs, knees, and hips.  I like to sit in my swing alone and bounce.  You don’t need to have a partner to use and enjoy the swing.  The feeling of weightlessness is great and you can just hang around in it.  This swing will actually support a person or persons up to 300lbs.  I could see it getting uncomfortable with the straps the larger you are.  I weigh right at 150lbs but my husband is at 200 so we did not get into the swing together.

The swing and set up are included.  The steel eye bolt attaches to your ceiling.  It was not difficult to find the  rafter and place the screw.  You can use a stud finder or construction  mathematics to find your center of your rafter.  We predrilled a hole and then screwed in the eye bolt.  The eye bolts can also be purchased at local hardware stores and you can place them around your home and move your swing around where you want it.  My husband was very impressed with the fact that the eye bolt is actually welded into a solid ring which he states gives it extra support and strength.  We used a bar to assist with the screwing in of the eyebolt.  There is a warning to not remove and reinstall the eyebolt as this will weaken the connection into the wood.  Once it is in leave it there!!  That is why I said to get more eye bolts and hang them.
You attach a chain to the eyebolt and you can adjust the links in the chain to the height that you want your swing to be.  The chain is long enough that the swing could actually dang near set on the floor.  The chain attaches to the eyebolt with an included carabineer.  Actually the man says those aren’t the good ones and to get a sturdier one.  Then the torsion spring is attached to the chain.  It is a very sturdy spring that allows you to go up and down and bounce in the swing.  Do not put hands near spring with use as you can get your fingers and parts pinched.

There is another carabineer and round bolt that attach to the spring.  The final metal bolt attaches into an arched metal piece that has a support bar welded into it.  The arch is 20 inches long and 2 inches wide.  The final metal bolt has 2 nuts on it and retention pins.  There is no way it is coming off of the arch.

The nylon webbing is stretched across the top of the metal arch and secured in 3 different spots.  The nylon straps are two inches wide.  The straps hand down 11 inches to a large plastic connector that connects the seat and back area.  The plastic connector is very large and sturdy. The connectors are two inches long and each slide portion is ½ inch thick.  Both the seat portion and the back portions are fully adjustable.

**My measurements are approximates only and they measure to the use area that ends with the stitching.**

The back portion has straps that when they are fully extended they measure 21 inches to the padding which sits in the middle.  That is 12 inches fully shortened to the padding.  The padding is 23 inches long and 3 inches wide.  The padding over hangs the webbing by ½ inch on each side.

The butt portion  straps are 13 inches at the shortest and 25 inches at the longest to the padding.  The padded area is 22 inches long with the padding extending the webbing by ½ inch on each side.

The leg portion straps are 15 inches at shortest and 26 inches at longest.  The area of the leg straps is 20 around.  With the entire area having 20 inches of padding.  You can place your feet, ankles or calves into this area.

The entire swing hangs down approximately 36 inches from the metal arch. It may vary depending upon how you have your straps tightened.

The padding.  This is the only area that I see lacking.  My husband explained it as the interior padding is white foam.  This is the less dense padding that crushes easily.  If it had black or grey foam in the inside it would hold up better.  The padding does stop the webbing from cutting into your skin but it does get uncomfortable after a period of time and readjusting has to happen.


You can take your swing down from the eye bolt in the ceiling or at the bottom of the spring with the carabineer.   The swing with the metal arch is only 20 inches long and it will fold into an area of 2 feet or less and the straps don’t take up much room.  You can place it in a small skinny Rubbermaid style of container or we just put it behind our bed.

Many persons have said to hang a plant on the eye bolt but some person said to place a dummy fire detector piece over the eye bolt and dang,  it works!!!  Some one may wonder why you have 4 fire detectors in your bedroom but most people don’t pay that close of attention anyway.

The swing webbing can be wiped down with a wet soapy washcloth to clean off spots.  The same with the nylon that is covering the foam padding.  There really isn’t any other way of cleaning it.

The sing has really good construction and I have no issues with trusting the safety of it.  Yes, the first time you use it you are watching your eyebolt praying your husband did it right.  The webbing and the connections are very tough and sturdy.  I can see us using this for years.

As for positions, I will let you look that up and use your imagination.  The possibilities are limitless.  I love the feeling of weightlessness and putting my head back and just hanging out.  This could be a drawback for someone who gets motion sickness.  I can sit in the swing and bounce my self.    I actually which that I could make the back strap tighten up more to place me into a sitting position so that I could sit in it and watch TV.  At  it’s tightest I am still at about a 30 degree angle.

Honestly, I could see this as great for when you have a cranky baby and you could sit in it with the baby and comfort them. ( I did not just say that!)

A warning:  If you are a squirter or a person with a large amount of juices you may want to place a towel on the floor under the swing.  It does work well to heighten your experience.

After out very first use of the swing I sat in it for another half hour or so, just amazed at the sensations and comfort.  I can rave on and on about this swing and would suggest to everyone who would listen to me.  I am trying to figure out how I can explain the joys of it to my parents and get them one for Christmas.  It would work well for those with chronic pain, aches and pains, any type of back, hip or knee problems.  It is very easy to get in and out of and you can adjust it to fit you and your partner.

I would definitely rate this at a 4.5 out of 5.  The only draw back that I can see is the lack of sufficient padding.  One person suggested to me to roll up a towel.  I was thinking that I know someone who sews and I may get her the supplies to make me a heavier padding that I can Velcro over the existing padding and take off to wash.

product picture
Swing by Pipedream
Material: Plastic / Metal / Polyester

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EGO E3  by Jopen

It’s soft, velvety, satiny and squishy!  This is the best cock ring that I have seen yet.  I cannot rave on about it enough.  It’s motor rumbles and the shell shape of it is perfect for hitting the right spots!  I have used this  with my husband and with some of my glass toys, it even makes your wood ones rumble too!!

Jopen does not disappoint.  It is rechargeable, but it comes with a USB charger.  I love their vibes all of them, and now we have  couples toys too!  It has the right to have an ego.


Soft and Velvety
Band is flexible


None that I have found

The ring works on all sorts of toys and makes them jump and rumble.  The ring also works on the husband and fit’s a variety of sizes.  The husband has worn it both only on the shaft and has tucked it up under his balls.  He likes it under his balls the best and states that the vibrations do carry through the silicone band.  It’s not too tight, just right.

It is made from the nicest silky, soft, squishy type of silicone.  You know when you have used some of the cock rings or clit vibe with intercourse and when it hits your clit and it smacks it hard or when it slams into your pubic bone?  This doesn’t happen with the EGO E3. It does have a firm core but is surrounded by the squishy silicone.

The silicone has the highest safety rating.  It is hypoallergenic, non porous.  It is latex and phthalates free. It can be shared with partner after proper cleaning. The shell has no tastes and no smells.  It does collect quite a bit of lint and hair.  It didn’t seem to pull what is left of my husbands pubic hairs.  Only use water based lubes so that the finish doesn’t get compromised.  When they say that the EGO E3 is virtually seamless it really is.  It’s almost unnoticeable.  It comes in the bright blue color.

The ring as I said is squishy and soft it has a “give” to it so it melds to you body, especially when things heat up.  The ring portion is flexible and will stretch easily.  It is quite thick and carries the vibrations well. There were no issue when removing the ring.  The  EGO E3 ring also doesn’t slide around with use, it stays put.

 The silicone itself has no texture but the shell indentations help with stimulation.  The shell shape of the ring hit’s the female receiver quite nicely the inner most largest portion hit’s the clitoris and the seams of the shell also excite the surrounding area.  It feels good with thrusting but also with a rolling or grinding type of motion.

The Ego E3 ring is  1 1/2 inches in diameter in the inside of the ring  when it is unstretched.   Stretched it will go to 6 inches in circumference.   The shell portion of the ring is  2 ½  inches  across by   1 ½  inches tall.  It is   approximately 5/8th  of an inch at it’s thickest.  The band at it’s thickest point is   ½  of an inch.  At it’s thinnest point on the bottom of the ring it is ¼ of an inch.

The motor is contained in the middle portion of the shell.  It goes from a low setting to a mind blowing strong setting.  If you set it on the counter when it is on it’s highest setting it will jump around.   To turn it on you push the top portion of the shell.  It glows blue when it is on.  If you press and hold the top portion is will go though levels to get to the highest.  If you press the button once when it is on it turns off.    So there is no way of telling how many actual levels of vibration there are.  It is very quiet, as I sit and turn it on as I am writing this review the other’s in the room cannot tell that it is on.  It cannot be heard over the covers.  It does have a locking mechanism. Just press and hold for 3 to 5 seconds and unlock it in the same manner.

The Ego recharges with a USB port into your computer and it takes approximately 3 hours for it’s first charge. It has a lithium ion battery that will last for years. It has lasted more than  two hours on the initial charge.  When it is charging it lights up on the top portion where the control button is located.   I do have an adaptor that will allow for a USB to be plugged into a wall outlet and this does work with the EGO.

The charging port is located on the end and the cord slips into it’s waterproof seal easily.  It is waterproof so you can take this one to the shower.

To clean the EGO E3 you can use anti bacterial soap and water or your toy sprays.  Do not boil or place in the dishwasher as it can damage the motor.  You can wipe it down with a 10% bleach solution.  It’s indentations with the shell shape doesn’t cause any issues with cleaning.  It is waterproof but I wouldn’t suggest soaking it in any cleaning solutions.  I only use water based lubes with my precious toys as it has been said that it can ruin the finish on the toys.

I have only placed the ring on the night stand and in it’s box that it came with.  I am very disappointed in Jopen for not including a storage bag.  This is a higher end toy and a high end company.  But, no storage bag.  I have other bags that I can slip it into for long term storage.  I store my silicone and other toys away from each other as they could hurt the finish on the toys.  I would say that this one is travel friendly it does have a locking mechanism in it but it is small enough that you could just put it in your pocket or purse.

The Ego E3 comes in a grey textured box with  Ego Logo on it.  The toy and the charger along with an informational pamphlet are nestled into a foam cutout.  The inner foam slides into the box.

 The pamphlet states

The Jopen Ego comes with a one year warranty and  you can purchase a 10 year extended warranty.

I seriously am so impressed I give the EGO 3 the top score whether you want to rate it a 10 out of 10 or a 5 out of 5.  I would suggest for beginners to experienced users!

1 comment:

  1. Sold! I think I'll be picking up one of these.

Extase Elegance

Extase Elegance

I am still not too sure about this one.  I like it but I don’t love it.  It has dual motors, it’s splash proof and rechargeable.  It has the coolest packaging but, the vibe really doesn’t do that much for me.


Dual Motors


Hesitations with changing Patterns
Not as quiet as I would like


It is a vaginal vibrator with a very slight curve to it that could be used by some for g-spot stimulation.  I wouldn’t suggest using it anally as there is no flared based and it may go missing.  It doesn’t perform real well as an external massager.


It is made from silicone, rates a 10 on the Eden Safety scale.  Hypoallergenic, non porous.  It is latex and phthalates free.  There is no smell or taste to this vibe.  It is a softer velvety type of silicone that really doesn’t collect too much lint or hair. This toy is very firm, it is actually a layer of silicone over plastic.  It has no flexibility.  It comes in several colors, purple, pink and the black that I chose.  It does have quite a bit of drag.  I use water based lube with it.  It does have the slight grooves into the insertable end but they really cannot be felt with use.


The elegance is a total of 9 inches, 6 inches being insertable.  It has the slight curve to it with the grooves that are etched into it, the grooves are approximately  1/16th of an inch.  The diameter is  1 ½ inch at it’s largest.  The shaft has a diameter of  1 ¼ inch.  The control panel is located on the non insertable end and take up a  3 ¼  inch by   1 3/4  inch area.  There is a seam around the control panel which could be an issue for some and with cleaning.


It has dual motors. The motors seem to be located on the back upper portion of the toy and the front of the insertable end.   On the control panel at the end there are + and - buttons that  turn the toy on and off.  There is also up arrows and down arrows present that take you through the patterns.  The basic vibration goes from a 2 to a level 4 on the vroom scale.  It is slightly buzzy and a little rumbly.  You just press and hold the  + button to increase the vibrations there really isn’t a push, push, push type of action so I can’t really tell you how many levels there are.

There are 5 different patterns.  The first is a steady pulsation with the insertable motor.  The next is both motors pulsing together, then you move onto a more intense pulsing, a pulsing back and forth between motors, and another type of a back and forth pulsing.  It is really hard to explain these.  You us the arrow buttons to cycle through the pulsation patterns and the down button takes you back to where you were at.  I did notice with a few of the patterns that there was some hesitation with the patterns.

The control panel stays lit up when the toy is on.  It is actually a quiet type of toy, not as quiet as the Jopens but barely heard over the covers.

The elegance  is rechargeable with a USB port in your computer or use the adaptor to charge in a wall socket.  To charge the toy there is a waterproof cap over the charging port.  It really isn’t waterproof just splash proof.  The control panel lights up when it is charging.  It takes approximately 3 hours for it’s initial charge and  then it runs for approximately 3 hours on it’s highest setting.  When the battery dies the toy with  suddenly stop working.  The control panel does give off  a red glow when it is about to die but this is only for one minute.  DO not use the toy when it is charging.  And the product info booklet warns to not charge for more than 24 hours.  The elegance also has a locking feature for travel, push down the up and down arrows at the same time for  5 seconds.  It unlocks in the same manner.
Care and Maintenance

The elegance washes up with anti bacterial soap and water, Toy sprays or Eden wipes.  The grooves aren’t hard to clean and you don’t actually have to use a brush you can use your finger tips.  I only use water based lubes as to not harm the surface of the toy.  I keep the elegance in a wonderful pouch that was provided with the toy.  I keep all of my silicone away from other toys and each other as it is thought that you can damage the finish this way too.


The Elegance has got the greatest packaging.  There is an outer cover that slips off to reveal the toy in a foam area that holds it and it has a bottom drawer that contains the product info, the charger, and a really nice suede like pouch to keep the toy in.

I would say that since it has a locking mechanism you could travel with this one but TSA will definitely know what it is.  I am so cocky that I really don’t care if they know what is it and what I use it for.  I would just smile and wink!!

I would only rate this one a 3 out of a 5 scale.  It is a great toy but it just didn't do that much for me.

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I have been using the Uma from Je Joue for months now and she is my absolute favorite.  She has never been put away, she actually lives on my night stand.  She is the one that I grab when the other toys fail in producing an orgasm for me.  She really isn’t that big, but  she can definitely pack a punch.  She is rechargeable and keeps her charge for a long time.

Velvety Coating


Uma is a rumbling vibe, only in the sense of her vibe power, she is quiet and powerful, sleek and sexy.  She has become one of my best friends.   She is great for clitoral stimulation and then she also goes diving for my g- spot.  I know she wasn’t meant to be double sided but when my husband inserted the end with the controls, I did not complain.   She does three somes, she likes to  play with my husbands scrotal sac, especially the underside. He agrees she is a great partner for play. I would be careful trying to use her for anal play, as she has no real flared base.

Uma is made of a matte finish silicone, She doesn’t have any textures, just smooth.  She is food grade, hypoallergenic, latex and phthalates free.  Uma does have some drag due to the matte finish so just a touch of water based lube takes care of it.  Please don’t use any silicone lubes on her as it can hurt her finish.   Uma doesn’t come with any odors.  She comes in a choice of purple, pink and lavender.

Uma is 7 inches long with 4 inches insertable. She is somewhat thin with a diameter of  1 ¼ inch.  Her control area is  2 inches wide  and basically 3 inches long.  On her bottom is  her  + / ~ / -  buttons.  The plus and minus buttons are raised but the  middle ~ button is level with her and has to be depressed to change her vibe patterns.  These buttons can be tricky at times.  You press the  + button to turn her on and to increase the intensity of the vibrations and you press the - button to turn down the vibrations and to turn her off.

She has 5 intensity levels and 7 patterns.  Uma is very quiet and she can’t be heard  from under the sheets.

Her patterns include:
1. Constant vibration
2. Constant Pulsing
3. Roller Coaster  J
4. Short pulsations
5. Medium intensity pulsations
6. Fast high pulsations
7. Long pulsations, stop and then restart.  ( kind of the wham stop wham version)

Uma cleans up easily with antibacterial soap and water, and toy sprays.  She is easy to clean since she is so smooth.  She is completely waterproof. You can use her anywhere.  Do not boil her or put her in the dishwasher as this may injure her internal workings.  I wouldn’t suggest submerging her in any cleaning solutions as soaking may hurt her finish.  I really haven’t had any issues wit her collect lint and hair as would be expected with silicone.

Uma is rechargeable so you don’t have to worry about any battery issues such as running out of batteries or filling up land fills.  She comes with a 54 inch long magnetic charging cable.  You simply put the charging piece up to her and she grabs onto it.  She takes approximately 2 hours to charge and she does for hours.  She doesn’t have any loss of power with usage.  When she is charging she has a light that flashes and when she is fully charged her light stays constant.  The light goes away after you disconnect the power cord.  The Je Joue power cables are all the same and you can use one to charge all of your toys.

Uma actually hasn’t made it to the drawer yet.  She has been living under my pillow, on the bathroom counter on her drying towel and on my nightstand.

She isn’t really discrete for traveling but I like her so much, Screw TSA if they know what she is for.

Uma comes elegantly dressed in a black box.  There is an outer sleeve to her black box that states “stimulate MORE”.  They didn’t lie with that marketing!  The black box contains Uma, her charging cable and an owners manual.

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Jopen Intensity

The Intensity by Jopen


Electro Stimulation
Clitoral Stimulation
Inflatable Shaft
Multiple settings
Orgasms Galore


Not waterproof
Batteries for power
Poor seams with electrode pads

First let’s get the specifics out of the way!


It’s big a total of 12 inches long, so basically it is as long as your hand and forearm.  It’s actually really funny looking, an awkward man sitting with one heck of a long head.  Insertable is only 5 ¾ inches so that makes the control area 6 ¼ inches.  It’s shaft is 1 ½  inches diameter without inflation and  2 inches diameter with .  The clitoral attachment is 2 ¾ inches long and has a diameter of 1 inch.  It has 3 finger type attachments  that are approximately 1/8th inch around.  The clitoral arm is very flexible and can adjust to fit many anatomies.  The electro stim pads are located on the shaft 1 inch back from the tip.

The Intensity has a neat feature that when you squeeze the bottom hump of the toy the shaft will then inflate.  I inflates up to 2 inches in diameter.  To release the air you push the black button on the back of the toy.


It’s made from medical grade silicone, a cross between pink and purple.  The silicone rates a 10 on the Eden safety scale, hypoallergenic, non porous, latex and phthalates free.  The handle consists of  ABS plastic covered with silicone and the electro stim pads are made from stainless steel.   Only use water based lubricant with the silicone or you can use the special electrode gel that comes with the toy.  It contains of reverse osmosis water, humectant polymers, propyl paraben, methyl paraben in a bacteriostatic concentration and colorings. I have used it without any  lubricants as it really doesn’t have any drag.  The intensity does collect a large amount of lint and hair.

The Intensity runs on 4 AAA batteries, the batteries actually do last for quite a few sessions. The batteries are inserted into the bottom area of the Intensity with a screw type lid holding them in. The intensity can be a pain with clean up.  The ridges of the insertable neck do tend to collect your secretions.  I use antibacterial soap and water on a wash cloth, or toy sprays.  You can also use the Eden wipes or a  10% bleach solution.  This one cannot be boiled or placed in the dishwasher it has motors!   The toy is not as loud as I would have expected it can be heard over the covers but not through doors.

The electro stim  metal parts have a seam where they meet the silicone that is also a special area to pay attention to when cleaning.

The Controls

These descriptions are all when looking down at the toy as if you had it inserted. Located on the 6 ½ inch external area are the controls. There is one central  on and off  button in the top center.  To the left there is a up and down button that controls the vibrations there is a V in the middle of the buttons. To the right there is an up and down button with a S in the middle this side controls the electro stimulation.  When you have the toy on a middle area lights up to let you know what level you are at.  It reacts quickly when you push the buttons up and down, there is no hesitation.

There are 5 levels of vibrations.  The only area that vibrates is the clitoral attachment  It goes from weak at level one to a vroom of 4 or 5 at it’s highest.  This toy is not quiet but is about a level 4, it can be heard above the covers.  The stimulation levels  range from level 1 to 10.  I can only tolerate up to level 3.

The Packaging

The Intensity comes in a purple box with an outer sleeve explaining the product.  The purple box contains the intensity nestled into a velvety foam.  You receive the tube of  electrode gel and an instructional booklet.

The moment that I turn on the electo stimulation portion I can feel a slight tingling and then as I increase the levels I can only go to a 3 and this is even after using it for months.  My muscles start contracting and yes, the combination of the clitoral stimulation and the electo stimulation I do have many orgasms in a short period of time.

I definitely can tell an increase in vaginal tone this occurred after only a short period of time using it.  I have also been using other kegal exercisers.   I no longer have issues with leaking urine when I cough, or sneeze even if my bladder is on the fuller side.

The intensity was created by medical professionals for increasing vaginal tone and to help with bladder problems, it was then that they found out with the test subjects, that they were experiencing pleasure from using the device.  Jopen got a hold of it and added in the clitoral stimulation.   They made an awesome toy with medical benefits!

I did not pay full price for this toy but I can honestly say that it is worth the full price they are asking.  Yes it is not rechargeable but from what I understand, that would have severely increased the price.

Caution:  you cannot remove the toy when the electo stimulation pads are activated.  It kind of burns on your external lips!  I did it.

I would definitely suggest this toy for beginners and advanced toy players and even to women who don’t play with toys if they are having bladder issues.  It works wonderfully for me  for both purposes.  Oh, and by the way the Husband states that he can tell somewhat of a difference.  He wasn’t really specific with me but he said that it seems “tighter”.

The Intensity does come with a list of warnings:

1. Be sure the Intensity is fully inserted and inflated before activating.

2.  Do not remove from vagina before it is completely turned off.

3.  Do not use on infected or irritated skin.

4.  Do not use if you have a pace maker or defibrillator.

5.  Do not use if you are pregnant.

6.  If you have questions about your health, consult your physician before using this adult toy product.

7.  The supplier/manufacturer bears no responsibility for this product if mistreated.

8.  Intensity in not waterproof.  Never fully immerse in water.

9.  Not intended for oral or anal use.

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